Winning an NBA championship is the ultimate goal, but let’s be honest—some teams are a little too desperate for one. Whether it’s decades of misery, a star player demanding a ring, or a fanbase foaming at the mouth for validation, certain franchises would absolutely make a deal with the devil himself if it meant hoisting the Larry O’Brien Trophy.
So, who’s ready to sign on the dotted line? Let’s rank all 30 teams from the most patient and entitled to the ones desperate enough to make a deal with the devil.
1. Los Angeles Lakers
This team doesn’t need to sell their soul—they just assume championships will keep coming. Whether it’s Kareem, Magic, Shaq, Kobe, or LeBron, there’s always another superstar on the way.
2. Boston Celtics
With 18 banners already, the Celtics want to win, but they’re not out here making desperate moves. The fans might be anxious, but the franchise is in no rush.
3. Detroit Pistons
This team has been stuck in a rebuild for 15 years. If they were going to sell their soul, they would have done it already. Instead, they seem content with this whole “slow and steady wins the race” idea.
4. Charlotte Hornets
Winning? In this economy? The Hornets seem to care more about vibes than actual success. No urgency here.
5. Washington Wizards
The most directionless franchise in the NBA. Even if they tried to sell their soul, they’d probably still miss the playoffs.
6. Houston Rockets
They’re in full rebuild mode. They’ll be good eventually—no need for drastic measures.
7. San Antonio Spurs
With Wembanyama, they can afford to be patient. The Spurs play the long game, and it usually works out for them.
8. Utah Jazz
No championships, but no desperation either. They seem content with being just competitive enough.
9. Minnesota Timberwolves
They should be desperate, but the front office is so dysfunctional they wouldn’t even know how to make a deal with the devil.
10. Orlando Magic
Too young and promising to need any dark magic just yet.
11. Oklahoma City Thunder
They have so many draft picks that they don’t need to sell their soul. They’ll win eventually through sheer volume.
12. Indiana Pacers
A mid-market team that’s always decent but never truly desperate for a championship.
13. Portland Trail Blazers
They had their chance with Damian Lillard and didn’t go all-in. That says everything you need to know.
14. Atlanta Hawks
They still believe in the Trae Young experiment, so no panic mode yet.
15. Denver Nuggets
They won very recently, so there’s no need to make any deals. If anything, the rest of the league is trying to sell their soul just to stop them.
16. Golden State Warriors
They’re spoiled with four rings in the Steph era, but if things start going south, don’t be surprised if they start making some morally questionable moves.
17. New Orleans Pelicans
They’re still hoping Zion can lead them to glory. If his injuries keep piling up, though…
18. Memphis Grizzlies
Ja Morant’s confidence is cute, but at some point, they need to back it up with wins. If they don’t break through soon, panic might set in.
19. Toronto Raptors
They literally sold their soul for one year of Kawhi Leonard, and it worked. They’d probably do it again.
20. Cleveland Cavaliers
They already got their LeBron ring, but if they want another one, they might have to start making some sketchy moves.
21. Chicago Bulls
This team has been stuck in mediocrity for years. If they could get back to Jordan-era dominance, they’d happily make a dark deal.
22. Miami Heat
Pat Riley doesn’t do “rebuilding.” He only cares about winning, and if that means making deals in the dark arts, he wouldn’t hesitate.
23. Sacramento Kings
After 17 years without a playoff appearance, Kings fans would probably hand over their firstborn for a championship. They finally got a taste of relevance again—now they want it all.
24. Dallas Mavericks
Luka Doncic is an MVP-caliber talent and they let him walk out the door, so they really need that ring to justify their decision. The Mavs need a championship sooner rather than later, or things could get ugly.
25. Milwaukee Bucks
Normally, a team that recently won wouldn’t be this high, but Milwaukee knows their championship window is now. If the Bucks don’t win another one soon, Giannis might start looking for real estate in South Beach.
26. Brooklyn Nets
They already tried to sell their soul—twice. First, with the Paul Pierce/KG disaster, then again with KD, Kyrie, and Harden. Both times, the basketball gods laughed in their face. But give them another shot? They’d do it again in a heartbeat.
27. Phoenix Suns
The Suns have made some deeply desperate moves in recent years, from gutting their roster for Kevin Durant to throwing max contracts at everyone. Their front office operates with the urgency of someone who just realized their car is about to be towed. They need this ring.
28. LA Clippers
The Lakers’ little brother is dying for a ring. They’ve spent years trying to escape the shadows of purple and gold, and despite throwing ungodly amounts of money at superstars, they still have nothing to show for it. If Steve Ballmer could legally perform a ritual sacrifice to guarantee a championship, he’d probably be first in line.
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29. New York Knicks
The Knicks haven’t won since 1973, and their fans treat a second-round playoff appearance like a championship parade. This franchise would happily hand over Madison Square Garden itself if it meant a title. Let’s be real—if James Dolan could buy a championship, he would have done it years ago.
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30. Philadelphia 76ers
No fanbase has suffered more heartbreak, injuries, and postseason collapses than Sixers fans. They spent a decade Trusting the Process, only for it to result in second-round exits and a never-ending carousel of disappointment. If given the chance, Philly would sell their soul twice for a ring—and probably still find a way to blow it in Game 7.