If you’ve ever had a job, you’ve probably heard your boss, manager, or even coworker say these things at least once. While some of them aren’t that bad and might make sense in the moment, they’re actually vague and horrible. If there was a perfect way to say, “this isn’t important to me right now,” these take the cake!
Seriously. Stop saying these things and instead use your words like an adult and say what you mean. No one likes hearing them. There are too many to count but, here are our top 10 WORST phrases from the workplace.
10: Wear Many Hats
This is basically a nice way of saying, “we’re going to need to you to do a lot of jobs but we’re only going to pay you for one.” Have you ever left a job and found out they hired TWO people to replace you!? Or worse, three!? Yeah, I have, too. What did “wearing many hats” get me? Complete exhaustion and burnout and possibly a little resentment for them not paying me for doing all the work.
9: Piggyback
I kid you not, I was once in a meeting where every single idea was “piggybacked” from another person’s idea. If you like an idea or opinion, just say, “hey I really like that idea….” and then move on to whatever your thoughts are. Use your words like an adult and praise the person for coming up with a good idea! When you “piggyback” an idea it’s like saying to that person, “your idea was great, but I can make it better.” Yeah, look at you over there, Craig, with all the great ideas you piggybacked on, we’re sure you’re getting a promotion because of it. [eye rolls in corporate]
8: Per My Last Email
If there was a perfect way to say, “hey idiot, read your emails,” this would be it. This phrase is almost one of my favorites and at the same time, horrible because of how passive aggressive it is. We all get so many emails and I would say most people just skim through theirs most of the time so yes, details are missed. If anyone has ever sent you this phrase in an email or worse, said it out loud during a meeting, you might want to rethink skimming the emails from that person!
7: Run It Up The Flagpole
What does this even mean!? What flagpole? Is my new idea sewn into some kind of new corporate flag? Will it sit under the other corporate idea flags on this imaginary flagpole?? It does mean to try a new idea but can’t we just say, let’s try this new idea? This is one phrase that is completely useless and should only be used sarcastically.
6: Let’s Take This Offline
Does anyone else feel like this is your parent scolding you at a party where they say through their teeth, “we will talk about this when we get home!” Just me? The world is changing and more people are remote workers (thank you, pandemic), but this phrase has been known to be used in the office, face-to-face. It makes it sound like we’re all robots and we have to go into ‘airplane mode’ to discuss a sensitive topic. For those who have no idea what else to say, may I offer this suggestion: “that idea is great and might need some more discussion, let’s set up a time to talk more.”
5: Mission Critical
Ok, unless you work on space rockets, this should be removed from your vocabulary. Mission critical implies lives will be lost and something will implode if this is not done immediately. Let’s go back to Craig who probably loves to use this when talking about TPS reports. Is it really that critical, Craig? Should I piggyback on your idea to make it MORE critical!?
4: Synergy
This has to be on the list, right? Mainly because I’m sure most people have no idea what it means anymore. It has been used so much this word has lost all meaning. The synergy between the sales and marketing teams is going to allow us to run their recent ideas up the flag pole, this is definitely mission critical. See? I wrote it and I’m not even sure what I was saying. Completely useless and again, should only be used sarcastically. If you’re saying “synergy” in a serious way, who are you?
3: The Compliment Sandwich
This is less of a phrase and more a way of speaking. If you hear your boss say, “first of all, you’re doing a great job…” brace yourself, you just messed up something. Managers love to soften horrible news with something positive first and then at the end. “You’re doing a great job! You messed up this thing which is unusual for you because you always do a great job!” It seems like a kind thing to do on the surface but most people would rather you just tell them if something went wrong. Especially if they are high-performers, get to the point so they can adjust and fix.
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2: Put a Pin in It
This is one that means you’re going to pause something without actually saying, let’s just pause that thing. Probably because it’s not mission critical, right? Don’t have the synergies aligned with the team yet? This is less helpful and sounds more like an insult you’d hear from some kid in the 90s – “put a pin it in, zit face!”
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1: Circle Back
When!? Have you ever been in a situation where something has been circled back on? In my very humble, corporate opinion, this one takes the cake on saying something without actually saying it. This is a great way to tell someone “this isn’t important right now and when I decide it is (which is probably never), we can discuss it then.” If you’re going to use this phrase, then let’s get more serious about circling back… bring the wagons.
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